It’s June 3, 2018, and I’m thirty today! Happy Birthday to me!
HOLY SHIT! Time flies!
Adults warned me, growing up, but I never really understood the validity of it. Until now. As I look to start my third decade, I realize that I’ve learned an exponential amount in my twenties.
They don’t teach you this type of lesson in school, although they should, which is self-love.
Self-love impacted me immensely as a young twenty-something-year-old. I hated myself. Literally, that’s the word for how I felt about myself; hate. There were many things I did wrong, perpetually driving myself further down the hatred rabbit hole, but I had to go through those rough and ugly times before I could fathom understanding the light of love.
I fall on the crutch of having mental instability. I mean, there are mental illnesses running through my family, and I unfortunately at a young age, also found myself severely depressed. When I was a young adult, I also started having extreme social anxiety – something I still deal with frequently. I think I mask it fairly well from people, but maybe not, as people call(ed) me ‘awkward.’
My mother always saw right through it though. She is my rock. Without her and my fathers support, I don’t know where I’d be. I’m truly blessed to have had them by my side through it all because there are many people who do not have the unconditional love I felt. We don’t truly know where someone is in there life.
Believe none of what you hear & only half of what you see.
Like myself, I’ll try to fake-it-until-I-make-it, if I need to. They call me a “high-functioning” anxiety-head. LOL! Well, that’s what I call it.
Life is hard, and as a young twenty-year-old woman, the pressure is on! Especially in today’s age, where social media dopamines hit hard, and we’re constantly looking for more and more likes (I’m still doing this – but in a more healthy manner)… We look at a woman online and on Facebook, and compare ourselves, wishing more (or LESS) of ourselves. I know men go through this also, but we as a young woman are taught that we have an expiration date, while men get fine like wine.
So one way I’ve helped myself overcome these societal pressures is by unplugging regularly.
6 things to do when unplugging the celly:
Meditation & Visualization
This is my favorite thing to do in the world. It’s helped me truly learn myself and slowly climb to a higher vibration in life. I personally love using crystals to aid in meditation, but it’s not necessary, plus maybe that’s not your spiritual journey.
Simply, sit quietly in a room (or a bath – yum) for at least 15 to 30 minutes. Sometimes you may fall asleep, and that’s okay, but other times, you’ll find yourself letting go completely of the world around you.
Once it’s all fallen away, I like to visualize where I see myself going. When I was really down in the dumps, I’d visualize joy & happiness.
Now that I’m vibrating much higher, I like to see in my mind’s eye where I want to be in the future. For instance, a best-selling author, on the Ellen Degeneres show, talking about where my inspiration for my fabulous novel came from.
However you meditate, it’s nice to have peace and quiet, to feel good in that silence, and listen to your inner-self. When the world goes away and you give your chance a second to listen to yourself, it’s extremely fascinating the things you’ll learn. Also, it’s extraordinary how you’ll feel.
I try to exercise as much as possible, because it’s what makes me feel the best about myself, physically. Call it vain, I don’t care, but I love the way I look when I’m working out consistently. However, it’s much more psychological than that. The way I start to feel about life, in general, becomes more positive. When I push myself in the gym and overcome simple one-minute cardio challenges, or get a little more weight pushing on a specific workout, I feel good about myself. My physical and mental align with one another.
Write (or Read)
Writing things down, especially in my darkest hours, has been the number one thing keeping me sane and alive. I learned this from an ex-partner, way back when I first started art school. He had taught me to keep a journal because I was having breakdowns regularly. Eventually, he left me for another girl, which prompted a massive heartbreak, but left me with the knowledge of writing my emotions out. As a young girl, I’d always loved writing, but this made me fall head-over-heels for it. Getting things I want to yell, out of my head, gave me a release. I didn’t feel the need to furiously scream at someone, or worse turn to myself and inflict pain to the outside of my body, in an attempt to stop the hurt I felt on the inside.
Writing does take a lot out of someone, and maybe your not going through the blues like I once was, in which I turn to a good book. Again, it brings the silence and calmness to our regularly hectic lives. Not to mention, it can transform our world and transport us somewhere we may never physically be able to go.
I am a creator. Maybe some of the things I create aren’t masterpieces, but other works are things to be proud of. Even more than being proud of it, or liking it, creative allows me to turn my brain off. When you get into a good groove of painting or drawing or even collaging/scrapbooking, your hands and mind move together, without other getting in the way. This can be an expensive unplug, but it’s so fun and so worth the effort.
I never liked cooking. I always wanted to be a made woman growing up. I mean, I was lazy as hell (sometimes — ok a lot of times — still am). However, when I started caring about the foods that went into my body, researching and finding new recipes to try, I found a love for cooking. For me, caring about myself was the very first step to self-love. I wanted to be healthier, so I research and found what I needed to be just that. It’s a fun activity that is a never-ending learning process, and at the end of it, you get something absolutely delicious… That’s what I call a win-win.
So this is kind of a weird one for me, because usually when I travel, most of my trip is completely unplugged. Mainly due to higher cell phone expenses, especially when traveling overseas. Yet, it can be therapeutic. I don’t normally endorse cruises, but the best thing about a cruise is 1. there are no phones and 2. you get to see places without even thinking twice about what to do or where to go, your itinerary is set for you. It’s an easy-peezy way to travel and just get out of your head, and life, for a week or so. Traveling is also important because you see different cultures and ways of life, which leads to understanding.
I’ll tell you, first and foremost, I’ve been blessed to have any amazing life. There has been terrible times, I’ve met ridiculously horrible people, I’ve had things happen to me too, which all led me to a very weak mind that blamed myself for all their wrong-doings, but I always had people in my corner who supported me even in my ugliest hour.
Thirty is going to be a different decade though, that’s for sure. I am worthy, I am beautiful, I am an amazing-freaking-human-being. I can feel all the incredible things on the horizon, making their way to me, and I am finally ready to receive!
Do you ever unplug? Either way, what do you do to clear your mind? Let me know in the comments below!
You are worthy,